Sorry!

I'm SO sorry to be horribly slacking here!  I can't even do a full entry right now.  I have added in several activities for myself and another for my daughter, and that means I'm having to get used to the new schedule.  Just give me a week or so to work it out and get back into the swing of things, and I PROMISE I'll do a full update with funny photos and everything.  I'm going to try to set this entry up so that you can't leave any comments, mainly because I feel guilty getting comments when I can't leave them. 

I am NOT disappearing, and just wanted to at least give a quick update tonight. 

Boring Rambling:  Well, I FINALLY finished my DVD Defensive Driving course and rushed my certificate to the judge today.  WHEW!  (I got a ticket many months ago, and procrastinated like crazy so I paid the price this week.)  I'd glance longingly at the computer just before I watched the next boring section of the video......but I knew if I even started reading and/or commenting I'd never get my course done by today.   Just thought I'd bore you with my reason for being scarce this week.  (To tell the truth, I'd forgotten about my ticket until I came across my letter that had my deadline on it.  Thank goodness I found it before it was due!)  I think I can relax a little now. 

In honor of my defensive driving completion, some bumper stickers. (That's car related, right?)

A bad day of fishing turns into a good day of drinking.

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

A fool and his money are my best friends.

A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.

Answer my prayer - steal this car.

And now for some FUNNY PICTURES:

Well, I guess this technically works.  It was funny to me though. 

This and That

The Boring Stuff:  Have you all wondered about me?  I haven't disappeared, but I AM behind on my comments so I promise I'll get as caught up as I can over the next couple of days.  (I won't get to comment much tonight due to how late it is...but I promise tomorrow night I'll get to a LOT of your Xangas!)  I took a computer break for a bit mainly due to too many things going on, and this is the first time I've really had a chance to get online.  I won't bore you with details.  We did have what we call "kid dates" on Saturday.  Once a month we each take a child out separately for some one on one time with us.  The next month we take the other child and so on.  It was a lot of fun.  Since the child picks the activity, I saw Nanny McPhee(sp?) and was pleasantly surprised.  I really liked it!  (My husband was taken to see Hoodwinked, he said it was tolerable.  LOL!)     I think both kids had fun, too.  They always seem to look forward to our "dates". 

Funny Stuff:   WARNING...some rated PG-13 items in this list.

How to read personal ads:

40-ish...........49

Adventurer........Slept with all your friends

Athletic..........No boobs

Average looking......Has a face like a basset hound

Beautiful..........Pathological liar

Emotionally Secure.......Medicated

Feminist.............Ugly ball buster

Free spirit...........Mad

Friendship first.........Trying to live down reputation as a slut

Fun.................Annoying

Gentle..............Comatose

Good listener......Borderline autistic

New-age............All body hair, all the time

Old-fashioned......Lights out, missionary position only, no oral

Open-minded.......Desperate

Outgoing..........Loud and embarrassing

Passionate...........Sloppy drunk

Poet..............Depressive schizophrenic

Professional......Certified bitch

Redhead.........Bad dye-job

Romantic.......Looks better by candle light

Social........Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray

Wants a soul mate.........Stalker

Widow................Drove first husband to shoot himself

Young at heart........Old bat

Now for Some Funny Pictures:

This next one below just struck me as funny for some reason:

This last one REALLY made me laugh.....HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

THE BORING STUFF:  I had a great time Saturday. I went out on a date with my hubby. We went to see Fun With Dick & Jane after eating at Red Lobster.  I learned I'm a cheap drunk when one glass of wine made me giggly. ONE. It probably didn't help that I was VERY hungry when I drank it, then didn't eat an appetizer due to diet reasons. LOL!  Then today (Sunday) I learned something else. Did you all know that it is GREAT to go shopping during the Super Bowl? I was able to park right by the door and shop in a nearly empty store. Woohoo! Normally Sunday grocery shopping is a nightmare. So, thanks all you Super Bowl watchers!

Warning: Some PG-13 items in this entry

Hi everyone!   I was just thinking to myself that I had nothing interesting to put on my blog, and then my husband walks in to tell me goodnight and gives me a little unexpected tidbit  : 

Husband:  I'm going to bed, I'm tired.  (leans down to kiss me.)

Me:  Goodnight.  (kisses him back)

Husband:  (as he's walking away)  Yep...tired.  T-A-R-D.  Tired. 

LOL!  I know it wasn't high end comedy, but it made me smile at least.  You have to imagine an exaggerated hick accent when he said this at the end also.  Adds to the moment.  Haha!

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Ok....next I thought I'd copy and paste some actual country song titles.  These are sheer poetry and very fitting with Valentine's coming up, don't you think? 

Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye

Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure

I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life

I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling

I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me

I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart

I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd  Win

I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart

If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I'd Blow It All On You

She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty

Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone

Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart

You Were Only A Splinter In My Ass As I Slid Down The Banister Of Life

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AND NOW THE FUNNY PICTURES:

Ok, I had 80's hair, but THIS takes the cake!!!

These guys below look like a cool group, don't ya think? 

This really made me laugh for some reason:

Not to offend any men, I just thought this next one was humorous:

I wonder if this next idea would work for dieting purposes, too?  LOL!